Torino Adventure 2007 - Last Chance
Oct. 4th, 2007 09:29 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
peg22Finally, smuggled back to me by the Welsh guy and the tranny's step-sister on her mother's side -
the final chapter . . . will the boys make it? Will the Torino be found or has someone already chopped it up into toasters and crockpots and salt and pepper shakers? Will Starsky ever venture out of the city again?
THE CONCLUSION: TORINO ADVENTURE 2007 - LAST CHANCE
So, the last we left the boys, they were stranded here:
They quickly used some rusty nails and Hutch's righteous indignation to untie themselves, Starsky muttering the whole time about "hazards of nature" and "the middle of nowhere," and "if I see any red robes, I'm shooting you first."
Starsky did take the blue house, but Hutch wanted "something with a porch," so he settled in next door.
They managed to find a case of pork and beans and a case of Coors Light, which sustained them for a few days.
Then Hutch found a beat up banjo and Starsky began looking for escape in earnest.
With only three more cans of beans, a jug of water, and some pine cones, they set out down the mountain.
Finally, after much grousing and a little Foggy Mountain Breakdown , they stumbled upon a little town.
Starsky wanted to go back to his blue house and Hutch told him to "cowboy up" and they searched the town for the Torino. Using Hutch's newly acquired tracking skills, they spotted the tow truck parked in plain sight and tracked the driver all the way back here:
Where they went in and had themselves a good old fashioned brawl. The local sheriff finally arrested the tow truck driver, who, after a dramatic reveal, turned out to be the Abandoned Mine and Day Spa's owner's son, who had come back to claim the inheritance money after his father died amidst suspicous circumstances involving a tall Welshmen and a tranny with a limp. {Ed. note - you can't make this stuff up!]
Apparently, the son had been kidnapping tourists for months, hoping that the town would fall into disrepair and he could buy the land cheap and build an Abandoned Mine and Day Spa amusement park.
So, the boys were heroes for the day in Last Chance, and drinks were on the house.
Having survived on beans and beer for so long, they got a little . . . soused on T-bones and moonshine.
Starsky kept the jug as a souvenir and Hutch reminded him they still hadn't found the Torino.
Starsky started to cry, but then the sheriff burst through the door, shouting that they had found
the Torino - but it didn't look good for the two ton hunk of metal . . .
After Starsky popped him one, they headed back up the mountain in search of the Torino. They rounded a small outcropping of rocks and Starsky's heart sank. "Oh God, Hutch."
It looked like curtains for the old red tomato . . . .Torino . . . whatever. But then Hutch remembered something he read in chapter three of The Mountains Are My Friends and they miraculously managed to get the Torino off the HUGE LOG and Starsky drove it gingerly off the BIG ROCK.
On the way down the mountain and out of town, they stopped to ponder their adventure and marvel in the beauty that is the Rocky Mountains . . .
They were so happy to be back in the car, and back together . . .
"It is beautiful out here." Hutch, feeling even more mellow since the Sheriff gave him cowboy boots and a big rifle as a gift, leaned over and kissed Starsky hard on the mouth.
Starsky wriggled away from him. "That is weird."
"What's weird?"
"That fuzz on your lip - gotta go Hutch - gotta go."
Hutch grabbed him again and worked on his technique. When he let him go this time, he chuckled as Starsky sank down to the ground, panting.
"What were you saying about my 'stache?"
Starsky fingered his lips and then pulled Hutch on top of him. "Not sure yet - I guess I could get used to it."
And they got used to it all afternoon . .
EPILOGUE:
The next morning they headed out back toward Kansas City - cuz that's also where everything ends - the Torino nicely washed and waxed, the wind in their hair, John Denver on the 8-track . . . it was perfect.
And as we fade out of our Torino Adventure, we eavesdrop for a moment on our boys as they drive down the highway. . .
"Hey Hutch."
"What, Starsky?"
"Look!"
"I see it, Starsky."
"Hey Hutch."
"Don't say it - please, Starsky - don't . . ."
"Come on, Hutch - you never let me have any fun."
"Oh for heaven's . . . okay. But just once."
"Okay. Hey Hutch."
"Yes, Starsky?"
" I DON"T THINK WE"RE IN KANSAS ANYMORE. . ."
THE END
So, the last we left the boys, they were stranded here:
They quickly used some rusty nails and Hutch's righteous indignation to untie themselves, Starsky muttering the whole time about "hazards of nature" and "the middle of nowhere," and "if I see any red robes, I'm shooting you first."
Starsky did take the blue house, but Hutch wanted "something with a porch," so he settled in next door.
They managed to find a case of pork and beans and a case of Coors Light, which sustained them for a few days.
Then Hutch found a beat up banjo and Starsky began looking for escape in earnest.
With only three more cans of beans, a jug of water, and some pine cones, they set out down the mountain.
Finally, after much grousing and a little Foggy Mountain Breakdown , they stumbled upon a little town.
Starsky wanted to go back to his blue house and Hutch told him to "cowboy up" and they searched the town for the Torino. Using Hutch's newly acquired tracking skills, they spotted the tow truck parked in plain sight and tracked the driver all the way back here:
Where they went in and had themselves a good old fashioned brawl. The local sheriff finally arrested the tow truck driver, who, after a dramatic reveal, turned out to be the Abandoned Mine and Day Spa's owner's son, who had come back to claim the inheritance money after his father died amidst suspicous circumstances involving a tall Welshmen and a tranny with a limp. {Ed. note - you can't make this stuff up!]
Apparently, the son had been kidnapping tourists for months, hoping that the town would fall into disrepair and he could buy the land cheap and build an Abandoned Mine and Day Spa amusement park.
So, the boys were heroes for the day in Last Chance, and drinks were on the house.
Having survived on beans and beer for so long, they got a little . . . soused on T-bones and moonshine.
Starsky kept the jug as a souvenir and Hutch reminded him they still hadn't found the Torino.
Starsky started to cry, but then the sheriff burst through the door, shouting that they had found
the Torino - but it didn't look good for the two ton hunk of metal . . .
After Starsky popped him one, they headed back up the mountain in search of the Torino. They rounded a small outcropping of rocks and Starsky's heart sank. "Oh God, Hutch."
It looked like curtains for the old red tomato . . . .Torino . . . whatever. But then Hutch remembered something he read in chapter three of The Mountains Are My Friends and they miraculously managed to get the Torino off the HUGE LOG and Starsky drove it gingerly off the BIG ROCK.
On the way down the mountain and out of town, they stopped to ponder their adventure and marvel in the beauty that is the Rocky Mountains . . .
They were so happy to be back in the car, and back together . . .
"It is beautiful out here." Hutch, feeling even more mellow since the Sheriff gave him cowboy boots and a big rifle as a gift, leaned over and kissed Starsky hard on the mouth.
Starsky wriggled away from him. "That is weird."
"What's weird?"
"That fuzz on your lip - gotta go Hutch - gotta go."
Hutch grabbed him again and worked on his technique. When he let him go this time, he chuckled as Starsky sank down to the ground, panting.
"What were you saying about my 'stache?"
Starsky fingered his lips and then pulled Hutch on top of him. "Not sure yet - I guess I could get used to it."
And they got used to it all afternoon . .
EPILOGUE:
The next morning they headed out back toward Kansas City - cuz that's also where everything ends - the Torino nicely washed and waxed, the wind in their hair, John Denver on the 8-track . . . it was perfect.
And as we fade out of our Torino Adventure, we eavesdrop for a moment on our boys as they drive down the highway. . .
"Hey Hutch."
"What, Starsky?"
"Look!"
"I see it, Starsky."
"Hey Hutch."
"Don't say it - please, Starsky - don't . . ."
"Come on, Hutch - you never let me have any fun."
"Oh for heaven's . . . okay. But just once."
"Okay. Hey Hutch."
"Yes, Starsky?"
" I DON"T THINK WE"RE IN KANSAS ANYMORE. . ."
THE END
